Photo credit: Karlene Macedo

“I have learned that there is more power in a good strong hug than in a thousand meaningful words.”

— Ann Hood

I found my 7-year-old niece whimpering behind a box in the laundry room. She had run off crying because no one would enforce the message she was delivering from her mom. She was obeying and trying to do right, but she didn’t have the authority to make her older brother get out of the pool.

So there she was crying and frustrated. I asked my niece why she was there and listened to her sweet little girl voice as she retold the story. Then I asked, why did you hide? I can’t comfort you if I don’t know where you are.

Picking up on that word, she sadly said, “There’s no one to comfort me.” My niece let me hold her as she expressed her frustrations. I had seen the event unfold and knew there was more to the story than she understood. In the moment, she didn’t need me to explain anything to her, she just needed to be loved.

“I know,” I said, “it’s hard to be little.” My thoughts receded to my own childhood remembering the same frustrations when I would tell my siblings, “Mom said” and be unable to make them listen.

After a little snuggle, my niece and I were off to watch a movie and ten minutes later she was back outside playing.

We never outgrow our need for comfort. It seems we exchange childhood problems for adult ones and learn to process grief in different ways.

The One who understands everything is God. I hope you will take your needs to Him in prayer. His word says he collects our tears in a bottle. How precious that our sorrows matter this much to him.

It’s important for some of our grieving to be private, but God also gave us each other.

As adults, we might reason we don’t want to bring anybody down, that we should be past it by now, or pretend that we are doing fine. I hope you will consider letting someone in to love you. What a healing gift of comfort we can receive from others. I know they might not do it exactly right, but they can try. And we can ask for what we need.

If you are the one unsure how to give comfort, remember we don’t need to know what to say. Other’s are not looking for advice, an explanation, or a spiritual justification. Those who are hurting simply need to be loved.

Like my niece, it’s easy to make the mistake of believing that there’s no one left to comfort us. But we might be difficult to find … perhaps not in the laundry room, but in the quietness of our soul.

In times of sorrow, I hope you will try something if you haven’t already: let yourself be known and loved.

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.”

— 2 Corinthians 1:3-4

“Self-care is giving
the world
the best of you
instead of what’s left
of you.”

— Katie Reed

Shade and water are not enough to keep my impatiens from wilting in the sweltering heat today. The same goes for me! As I write this, we’ve been experiencing record-breaking temperatures this week of over 100 degrees in Washington- a state where moss and slugs normally flourish.

My flowers remind me that sometimes, we too can wilt under the pressure or losses of life. Has anything occurred in your world to cause record highs of stress? How is your time spent… rushed with an overcommitted schedule, weighed down by heavy emotion, or something else that is taking its toll?

We might manage okay for a while taking care of people and tasks, but we will lose our reliability, peace, and good nature if we neglect one factor that keeps or efforts humming - ourselves.  If we go down, there are a lot of people relying on us (jobs, families, you name it) and we forget that sometimes the most loving thing we can do is take a personal time-out. That is – to rest.

What fills you up? Here are a few ideas to get you thinking: a nap, quality conversation, time to process or journal, prayer, nature, a book, art, music, a massage, a date, daydreaming, exercise, sunshine … the more expended you feel the more you will need to fill up.

I hope you will pause and take notice of your needs and meet them.

Maybe it’s time to find some shade and water. Then that flowerpot of yours will be ready to share its beauty with the world.

Brian Jennings Photography

“Earth’s crammed with heaven, and every common bush afire with God: But only he who sees takes off his shoes.”

— Elizabeth Barrett Browning

The idea of rest in a lush green pasture feels peaceful to me.  Nature has a way of satisfying our souls.  It gives us a place to exhale our worries and inhale beauty.

The Psalmist, David was a shepherd who grew up tending sheep. I imagine he loved the land. He knew the terrain of its rocky peaks and the cool fragrance of its wet valleys.  He would wake in the morning to grasses glistening with dew, at mid-day he’d guide the flock to a refreshing stream, and in the evening, David would gaze with satisfaction across the hills, glowing amber in the sun.   

Do you have a meaningful place that brings you peace?

God made His creation for us to enjoy.  He didn’t  have to make it beautiful, majestic, or fragrant for us, but he did. 

If you need a little peace today, will you take time to enjoy something lovely in creation?  Study the intricacies of a flower, lay on the lawn, stare up at the clouds, listen to a stream, smell a flower and memorize its scent, notice all the colors of the sunrise, feel the smooth petals of a rose, or study the night sky.  The possibilities are endless. Take time for beauty. Breathe it all in.

Any day is a good day for appreciating creation. But it’s especially important if you feel caught in a place that seems harsh and cold, physically or emotionally. If you can’t actually touch the earth’s beauty, you can still recall it.  Bask in something beautiful today and let God refresh your soul.

“Psalm 23

A psalm of David.

The Lord is my shepherd, 
I lack nothing. 
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,  
he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths
for his name’s sake.
Even though I walk through the darkest valley,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,     
they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;     
my cup overflows.
Surely your goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord
forever.”

— Psalm 23

“And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.”

— Romans 5:5

Have you ever seen a movie where the bride is left standing at the altar and the groom gets cold feet and doesn’t show up? It’s usually a comedy with some silly problems and big blunders, but if that happens in real life, it’s not funny.

The promises of people are fickle – including our own. We might not have been abandoned at the altar, but we could have been left waiting and hoping somewhere else.  If you have ever been let down by someone’s promise, you know what it feels like to have dashed hopes.

Do you know that God never breaks a promise? Every word of his is true and reliable. That’s why God’s word says that hoping in him does not put us to shame.  There will never be any public embarrassment, feeling stupid, unworthy, or unloved by him.  Now that is like a deep breath of fresh air!

Abraham is called the father of all who believe. He received a promise from God that he and his wife would have a baby even though they were long past childbearing age. “Abraham never wavered in believing God’s promise. In fact, his faith grew stronger, and in this, he brought glory to God.  He was fully convinced that God is able to do whatever he promises.” Romans 4:20

The amazing thing about God’s promises is they last for eternity. The challenge for us is that we see our lives between the dash: the date we are born and the date we die.  Abraham did receive the child God promised in his lifetime, but it was a loooong wait until Isaac was born to him and Sarah (at 100 and 90 years old).  There were other promises that Abraham did not see happen in his life like the many nations that would come from his line, descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky, and the land of Canaan that God would give him and his family.

Faith is believing in God. This is what Hebrews Chapter 11 is all about – people of faith who kept believing God through their lives and unto death.  Sometimes we expect happy answers in this life and if we don’t get them, we can blame God and doubt our faith.  Read the end of Hebrews 11 and you will see some believers kept up their faith in tortuous circumstances, but they placed their hope in a better life after the resurrection.  (Hebrews 11:35).

I want to encourage you, to not let your hope become short-sighted. If you have put your faith in God, you’ve got an eternity ahead to experience a good life!

God has a wedding planned. It will be a massive celebration, the wedding of all weddings where the church is the bride and Christ is the groom. Believe me, He is showing up!

Put your hope in him, He will not put you to shame!

“Of One Thing I Am Perfectly Sure:

God’s Story Never Ends with Ashes”

— Elisabeth Elliot

I’m looking at the Kaleidoscope on my desk. It’s handmade by a stained glass artist.  I see the capsule of broken glass pieces facing me – colors of blue, green, purple, and red.  Their sharpness takes me back. I remember the raw edges of pain, the shattering of my heart.

Perhaps you feel it now and you’re wondering what to do with all those broken pieces. In the moment, we want to turn back the clock, resist the reality we’re facing, or just scream from the pain we cannot define.

It might seem difficult to imagine any good coming after this. For the moment you might just need to survive.

But, I can tell you that God is faithful. He’s with you. He will be your friend that sticks closer than a brother. He is the God of compassion who will hold and comfort you. You will never be alone because God will never leave you or forsake you. You might have a hard time envisioning it now, but God works for your good, He turns beauty from ashes, makes the desert grow, and He will bring joy again. No word of God can be thwarted, and that includes His promises to you.  In Him, we find our hope.

What can you do?  Still your heart and know that He is God.  Surrender, trust, and follow Him. He will lead you by streams of still waters and restore your soul. Yield to Him and he will make something good even out of your pain.

In time you will see a kaleidoscope of beauty, from all those broken pieces.

“May the LORD bless you and keep you;
may he make his face shine on you
and be gracious to you;
may the LORD turn his face toward you
and give you peace. ”

— Numbers 6:24-25

(Additional scripture references: Psalm 33:4, Proverbs 18:24, Psalm 116:5, Deut. 31:8, Romans 8:28, Isaiah 61:3, Isaiah 43:19, Job 42:2, 1 Tim. 4:10, Psalm 46:10, Psalm 62:8, Deut. 13:4, Psalm 23).

“Hope is the thing with feathers

that perches in the soul,

And sings the tune without the words

And never stops at all.”

— Emily Dickinson

My imagination comes alive reading this excerpt from a poem by Emily Dickinson. It pulls together two loves of mine: beautiful writing and steadfast hope. I can imagine hope flying, perching, and singing like a songbird. I love the idea of hope perching in my soul, not stopping, but enduring.

We can put our hope in a lot of things: people, circumstances, our desires. But do you know that hope placed in God is another matter altogether? It’s strong. It’s confident. It’s an anchor for our soul.

Hope is a confident expectation in God and His Word.

Who do you know that is full of hope? I bet they see the world through a lens of faith trusting God to work for their good in difficult circumstances. Their sights are set on heaven where God will bring justice and glory to our world. And this assurance … they KNOW in their bones. 

These heroes of the faith have likely been through a hefty trial or two. Their faith has been tested and they’ve experienced God as he says he is … strong, faithful, and closer than a brother. Do you know their stories? He’s made Himself real to them, so real, there is no doubt. Now, God is not like a fairy godmother or godfather granting every wish, but He’s good, so good. In fact, His love never fails.

If you read the verse below, it talks about how we can glory in our suffering, not for suffering's sake, but because of its result. And what is the result of our suffering?

“Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. ”

— Romans 5:3-4

If you have hope, can you trace it back to suffering? Or, if you are presently suffering, will you press on knowing God will keep you through your trials and transform you into a person full of perseverance, character, and hope? Stay strong and keep your faith. 

Perhaps someday, our hope, though forged in the fire and as tough as nails, will be able to sing, carefree as a bird, perched in our soul.

“One thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead.”

— Philippians 3:13

I took my time traversing through wet grass, trees, and bushes looking for my golf ball. Even though I’d observed its path along a pair of trees, I couldn’t find my shiny new ball anywhere. How could I lose it so easily; it was bright pink?!

Do you know there’s a time limit for searching for lost balls?  The purpose is to keep the game moving along continuously without long pauses in play. Since I was playing alone, I had a bit more time to poke around for it.

Some things, we never recover. It was true that day; I left my ball behind, somewhere.

I’ve lost a lot of things in life … and I’m not talking about little golf balls. Can you look back on your life and sense the sorrow over lost years, lost opportunities, lost health, lost finances, lost trust, a lost marriage … ugh losses.

The famous poem in Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 rings true – there is a time for everything, including a time to let go of our losses.

“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:

 a time to be born and a time to die,
     a time to plant and a time to uproot,
      a time to kill and a time to heal,
     a time to tear down and a time to build,
     a time to weep and a time to laugh,
     a time to mourn and a time to dance,
     a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
     a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
      a time to search and a time to give up,
     a time to keep and a time to throw away,
       a time to tear and a time to mend,
     a time to be silent and a time to speak,
      a time to love and a time to hate,
     a time for war and a time for peace.”

It is very normal and important to grieve our losses. But if in time, our sorrow turns sour, we’ll need to ask ourselves if we’re stuck.  Our pain can turn into depression, resentment, unforgiveness, negativity, ruminating on the past, complaining, bitterness, displaced anger, blaming, despair, and regret. Do you see these reactions creeping into your life?

We have an abundant life ready to experience now – there are people to love, our potential to develop, and our purpose to carry out. How can we let our past continue to rob us?

The apostle Paul said, “One thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead (Philippians 3:13).”  I imagine he had to forgive and let go of a lot of things including persecution, abandonment, and injustice.

In golf, we’re given just three minutes before we cut our losses, but in life, it’s likely to take longer, but how long?  Is it your time and season to let go? Imagine if you could be free and unburdened. Can you see yourself being happy, creative, and optimistic? What would it be like if you could look forward instead of back? What if you could let go of the life you wished you had so you could dream new dreams for your future?

“Let the King of my heart
Be the mountain where I run
The fountain I drink from
Oh, He is my song”

— Lyrics from King of My Heart

I looked around the room in church one Sunday when singing the above song about God (King of my Heart) and wondered if I was the only one who couldn’t join in the chorus. God had let me down, badly.

How about you? Has injustice hurt you or those you love, has God allowed a tragedy or illness that doesn’t make sense, have you felt blind-sided and unprotected?

Does it feel like He’s let you down?

I suppose it’s how we look at it.

My hardships have tested my faith. I’ve come to realize that although the world crumbles in trouble and my circumstances don’t always work out how I’d hoped, God is faithful through the trials.

A quick look back into the Bible I can see this to be true. Stephen was stoned to death for his faith. Did God let him down? Well, Stephen was given a beautiful vision of heaven as he was being martyred and filled with such peace and love that he prayed for God to not hold this sin against those killing him (Acts 7:54-60). Stephen went to heaven as a worshipper and an inspiration to many. God gave him the grace to be martyred as a victor. And he will certainly wear a victor’s crown and reign with Christ in eternity. Was God faithful? I’d say, “Yes.”  

What about the apostle Paul, missionary and author of much of the New Testament? He faced floggings, shipwreck, imprisonment, false arrest, poverty, derision, and a thorn in his flesh. Yet God said, “My grace is sufficient for you, my power is made perfect in weakness.” Did God ever make his calling easy? No, in fact Paul suffered very much for the gospel. Yet, through all this suffering Paul tells believers to rejoice in the Lord and to pray with thanksgiving. He told them, “The peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:7).” Paul said these things because he knew them first hand; he had God’s PEACE! Was God faithful? Again, I’d say, “Yes.”

Both Stephen and Paul could have felt let down by God, but their eyes were on something different than their circumstances.  They were living for Him no matter the cost.

In our lives, we might experience a miraculous rescue story. Or, we might get through an unchanging, difficult circumstance with the strength and grace God provides.  Either way, He’s faithful.

Instead fixating on the story you want, will you look for God’s grace instead? In that arena, “He’s never gonna let you down.”

Wild Pink Roses, Beauty Among the Thorns

“Thou hast not that, My child, but thou hast Me;
And am not I alone enough for thee?
I know it all, know how thy heart was set
Upon this joy which is not given yet.”

— Amy Carmichael

“I’ve got some good news and some bad news…” my dad begins as he starts off a story.  It’s usually a joke that makes us all laugh.  Experiencing the bad with the good, isn’t this true of life?  

My longing for good gets shaken up by reality at times.  We all want life at its best: the kids to be successful, our bodies to be healthy, our finances to balance and investments to increase. We want our relationships to thrive and our romances to play like a storybook. We want others to be truthful and look-out for our best.  If they don’t, we get burned and wonder why people have to act the way they do.

When life crashes, when it really levels us, we can feel dismayed.  These kinds of losses are shocking and painful.  Have you ever found yourself so grieved and angry that you demand an answer from God? We innately KNOW life’s not supposed to be this way. So we fight it, we swing at the darkness, not making any difference. “Acceptance” can be the hardest part of the grief process.

A pastor once told me, “You’re longing for Eden, but you aren’t there yet.” It’s true.

I’m in a prayer group of women.  And do you know what? We never have a meeting when there are no prayer requests. As soon as one problem is solved another one pops up. This is life. It’s not picture-perfect, and it won’t be, this side of Heaven.

Do you feel the tension … wanting life as it “should” be and not as it is?

Here are a few ideas to help:

• Know your hope of Heaven will someday come true. Be patient and wait for it.

• Remember we are living in a broken world, there will always be weeds in the garden and sinful, cruel people (they might even be us at times), and there will be disease and death. Try to accept it. I didn’t say you have to like it or agree with it. But, it’s just crazy-making to bang our heads against the wall saying it’s not supposed to be this way.

• If you’re grieving, grieve.  Don’t add any more expectations on yourself.  Allow yourself some time to heal. (In fact, I hope you go wrap up in a warm blanket and wait to finish reading this another time).

• Practice your gratefuls, EVERY DAY. Focus on the good.

• Be a light.  You can do this! Make things fun, add your humor, share your talent, be generous, do a good deed, share a smile.  Be “good news” in someone else’s life.

• Don’t get fooled by what you see on media – it’s all filtered and presents the best, not the worst. We all do it; I’m not going to tell the public of my recent fight, surgery, or share my ugliest picture. So don’t compare your life with someone else’s best life image.

• Remember God is WITH you.  His presence, strength, comfort, and love will get you through the storm.

• Lean into God instead of fighting Him. Some of His best work happens in the dark as we surrender and worship.  

• Love yourself.  Be gentle with your expectations.  Take time to feel your feelings. Do some healthy things that fill your heart.

• Share your feelings with someone you trust (like a friend, pastor, or counselor).

We can all get caught between the now and the not yet, desirous for the way we want life to be.  Even when we don’t see it, God is working.  He is working for the good.  We might see it soon, or, we might have to wait until Heaven.  But we will see it.

So let me end by saying, “I’ve got some good news and some bad news …” and someday the bad news is getting swallowed up in victory. I’m cheering for you – that no matter what comes your way, you will persevere in faith, and offer your own blend of good news wherever you go!

“Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.”

— Hebrews 10:23-24